Nervous - Part 2

Nevermind my last post. I've changed my mind.

I am sick, absolutely *sick* of my Bastard ex having a go at EVERYONE who's currently a significant part of my life.

We'll start with a friend of mine who, because she doesn't want her personal details splashed all over the web, I'll neither name nor describe in detail. I will say that she's pregnant, and there are *all kinds* of issues going on with her... and my asking Bastard to watch HIS OWN KIDS an extra couple of hours on Sunday so I could visit her in hospital amounted to a seemingly-endless rant (a bit in person, and more on his blog later) about how she's a shit friend, and I have an attitude problem, and so on and so forth, et cetera et cetera et cetera.

That's it. That is purely the last fucking straw. He's just mentioned how fucking much it bugs him to be 'guilted' into having the kids on his 'every day off' one time too many, and I've just had enough. Assuming things go alright tomorrow, he can celebrate by having the kids this weekend--if he wants them. If not, he can wait until the first weekend of August; I'm not having any more of this. I am just not having anymore. He can have the kids every other weekend, like every other divorced father in the history of the world, and he can just be damn grateful for what he gets. Pissed off about my new bloke seeing them more than you see them? That's just too damn bad. You complain every time I 'guilt' you into taking them, so you can just take them less, and he can occupy the role that you've abdicated.

I'll *try* to remember to correct them, when they start calling him 'Dad' instead of you.

And. On the subject of 'him'--I'm glad they'll have a decent male role-model to look up to. I'm *ecstatic* that I've found a guy I think is worthy of spending some time with my kids. I can't wait to see how much happier, healthier, and just nicer they are in the long run, as a result of his influence. I look forward to the day when I turn around and thank him, for his part in the fact that my kids have grown into kind, thoughtful, honest individuals. I look forward to some of his integrity and willingness to work hard and general usefulness rubbing off on them.

I literally cannot wait to see how much better they turn out, for having a decent father-figure in their lives. God knows they'll be better off without their biological father's spiteful, vindictive, fantasy-based, misanthropic mutterings in their ears.

Finally. Just to return to my pregnant friend--I want to apologise to her, for sharing any of her details with my Bastard ex in a misguided attempt to call on any sympathy or decency he may possess. Clearly, he has none of either, and is just low enough to stoop to taking pot-shots at heavily pregnant, seriously ill women who already have far too much on their minds and don't need his self-obsessed SHIT on top of it. Again, I'm sorry--you and I both know you've always been the best friend you know how to be, and if you've ever fallen short of the mark of perfection, well, that's what people do. They fall short of perfect.

And GOD KNOWS I've fallen short of it, yeah? You know what I'm talking about. The time of Secret Sandwiches, etc. I was such a dick then. I blatantly *deserved* you being a shit to me afterwards.

Not that you *were* a shit--we have our own lives, we drifted apart for a bit and then YOU made the effort to get back in touch with ME (and I'm so glad you did, I missed you, you know?). And even if you *had* been a shit--what you are going through is unimaginable. I am so, so sorry, once again, for mentioning ANY details of your plight to my Bastard ex, or his Bastard family. They think I'm the anti-Christ, well, they're about to find out just how fucking evil I can be. Don't stress yourself out. Too much has been said, and none of it's meant in a nice way, and he/they won't get away with it.

I'm not being vindictive. I just don't want my children associating with that class of people any more than they have to.